As tour guide for the year I am trying to strike a balance between having a life-altering experience overseas and taking part in shameless tourist activities which are nevertheless well worth doing. So you can imagine my dilemma in Port Douglas, where they promise Breakfast with the Birds at the Rainforest Habitat, a chance to commune with nature while you select from their self-confessed stunning breakfast buffet, all for the bargain price of $39, which includes entry to the habitat itself.
The birds won, of course, so I spent the first half of the week hoping the breakfast might prove an incentive to Darren, given that he tends to be a bit wary of anything feathery landing within five feet. Alas no, he wouldn't be drawn on it.
But then it turned out that Lucy the Kiwi hockey girl was desperate to go, though her parents weren't interested because, well, I think they belong to that generation that watched the Alfred Hitchcock film and could never look at a budgie again without thinking it had designs on pecking their eyes out, so I offered she could come with me and hey presto, I had the essential extra pair of hands I needed to deal with Ella and a buffet and some birds - symbiosis is alive and well on the barrier reef, and it doesn't end at the coral.
As promised, the breakfast was stunning - a whole island of food underneath a canvas shade cleverly designed to minimise the impact of bird droppings on your bacon. The birds themselves ranged from rainbow lorikeets (see photo) to black cockatoos to wading type birds with a peculiar smug look on their faces, probably due to being in such close proximity to an endless supply of Cocopops.
"Please don't feed the birds" announced the officious official showing us to our table. "it disturbs our ecology".
What she should have said was "they're quite capable of feeding themselves".
Ecology schmology - and I've a nagging issue with the hygiene that just won't go away.
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