Reasons to Leave Australia - 2

Australian Media.

That's telly, radio, newspapers and magazines, all of it complete drivel, especially the telly; five terrestrial channels summarised as follows:

(a) The ABC. Strangely familiar, until you realise they buy most of their stuff from the BBC back home. Problem is, they don't buy the good stuff, they go rifling through the bargain racks and come back with the sort of stuff you'd find in an outlet village. Think the January sales at Cheshire Oaks and double it; the hilarious My Family, the stonking Vicar of Dibley. And worst of all, they're still showing comedy classics like Benny Hill and On the Buses. Is it any wonder we've turned to drink when you consider we've been confined to this flat most nights for the last twelve months?

(b) Channel 9 - Does anyone know a single thing that's on Channel 9 apart from Richie Benaud and the cricket? Oh hang on, yeah, they're showing old episodes of ER.

(c) Channel Ten - Neighbours, neighbours, neighbours and neighbours.

(d) Channel 7 - Like ITV without Ant and Dec. Or any good programmes.

(e) SBS - like Channel 4. Probably because they buy everything from channel 4. Think Wife Swap USA and Shameless and Dispatches, only we've seen them all before. Nothing stranger than watching something set in Salford when you're stretched out in Sydney to remind you of your roots though.

Pah.