Australia Square

Christmas shopping in Sydney today reminded me how good the shops in Britain are. Don't get me wrong, Sydney's great for make-up (though more expensive) and perfume, bags, shoes and fancy bikinis, but none of that's much use to the people back home. And besides, anything really valuable has to be insured in the post.

The thing I've noticed about having Christmas in summer (apart form it being more low key) is that the shops now have to display their Christmas stock alongside their summer stock, which means the aisles are packed and it's even more difficult than usual to go shopping with children. In Britain, the shops can stock their picnic plates and paper lanterns during June and July, but in Australia, the picnic rugs are competing for space with the tinsel because everything comes at once. During the winter, Sydney truly goes to sleep.

I had to go down to Circular Quay this morning, so had a quick look around the tourist shops for a particular tee-shirt that's been eluding me for months; something really noice for our welcome home party. I found something nearly right, but when I tried it on in medium I found it didn't fit, and neither did large or extra large, which was doubly annoying as they had no changing room so I had to put up with an annoying Japanese shop assistant hoiking them over my shirt. A size fourteen top, it would appear, equates to a size XXL in the tourist shops, which makes perfect sense when you look around and see the Chinese/Japanese shop assistants and the Chinese/Japanese customers, all of whom want to go home with a kangaroo sweatshirt.

Anyway, exhausted by the palava, I met Steve for lunch at Australia Square so we could plan our Christmas dinner.

Australia Square is an office block in downtown Sydney, the sort of place that comes alive between the hours of midday and 2pm when the surrounding area empties of people in suits on their lunch break. The building itself looks like the cylindrical version of the Rubik's cube (you know, the one for thickies like me who couldn't do more than one side of the original) and handily for the people who work there (like Steve), you can arrive early and leave late; the ground floor hosting several eateries, a post office, newsagents and dry cleaners. What more could you need?

If you detect a sense of bitterness then it's probably because Australia Square's full of thin twenty-something women in chirpy nail varnish and pinstripe blouses. The ones in their twenties look like they try too hard, the ones in their forties look like they know their jobs and the ones in between aren't there because the thirty-somethings are at home raising children. In fact, the ones raising children probably wouldn't be seen dead in Australia Square, either because they've bought their way out of the corporate lifestyle (like Jan the lawyer), or else because they've not got the right sort of clothes any more. I always feel scruffy in Australia Square; scruffy, baggy and old.

Anyway, I've got two more observations about the place. (1) the woman on the sushi counter doesn't wash her hands after she's used the toilet (so have salad instead)and (2) the toilets are remarkably close to the floor, as though designed for small people.

Short toilets? Small tee-shirts? I think I detect a theme.